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090110 -; the trickling tears..
Friday, January 8, 2010 | 9:37 PM my heart ached, when ii realise ii couldn't do a thing for him .. when ii knew he wad in pain .. In case you're wondering who's that 'him' .. its my beloved doggie, Marco. He accidentally hurt his leg ytd .. when he got too excited .. he was in extreme pain .. i could do nothing .. I could only tell him we would have to wait for my mum to be back and decide what to do.. I was hoping my mum would agree to bring him to the vet .. But things didnt proceed as I wanted.. mum refused to bring Marco to the vet .. complaining of the expensive fees we would have to pay.. I felt dejected .. I blamed myself .. for being so useless .. if only I was working, I could afford the fees.. My tears trickled .. the first thing I did when I woke today was to check how was he.. but he was still in pain .. when I touched him, I could feel him trembling.. later in the evening today, he let out a scream and stopped in his tracks to greet my mum and instead when back to the room. These little actions hurt .. but I could do nothing .. and only watch him hurt in pain .. I dont want anything to happen to him .. I'm so useless .. School's starting on monday.. and i dread the arrival of monday .. time flies .. I still have no motivation to live .. I'm still the same .. I still prefer to keep to myself .. and I doubt anyone reads this blog .. of mine .. hah .. |